December 20- 2014 (So this is a blog)

                                                                    So this is a blog...

                                          Hello people, and thank you if you are reading this.

I find a lack of purpose in my life. My parents have raised me to understand the reality's of life. One of those realitys is you are going to work a lot of your life, and do things you don't want to do.

I'm 16 years old. This is my first time writing a blog. my name is Phillip.

Beyond that, my parents are workaholics. So it's annoying. Beyond that, I am homeschooled. so I have no friends. I find my self on my computer, with literally nothing to do. That's if I am even allowed on my computer. Though I bought my laptop for $1000.00, my parents tend to take it away because I'll slack on school or chores. Know that might seem like commonsense and right to you. But look, I'm 16. I'm in pre-calculus, and it's not very easy to teach myself that, especially when I have nothing to look forward to in life, no purpose. Math, school, and chores are the last thing I have any inspiration to do.

But they don't get that I guess. I'm not into talking them either.

Basically, I'm mainly stuck at home, and have no one to relate to, talk to, or be close to. Because my whole family has been homeschooled, all 10 of my siblings and I, we sorta became friends. But, you know, we are extremly close... and that is not really friendship. Plus you don;t necassarily relate to your brothers/sisters. So outside friends are nessasary I think, or atleast will be more interesting.

Yeah.

There's just an extreme lack of motivation or purpose in my life. Never had a girlfriend, controlling religious parents(not as bad as some). I don't want to continue studies, atleast in the setting I am doing them, at home. It's hard for me to teach my self, My parents have me on call. "Get me a towel please phillip" leave studies. Or during the winter I tend to go do work in a shop for 2-5+ hours everyday, then school, then misc, then chores, +eating, thats my day right there. So little time for anything else.

I want to leave, I want to do something I want to do with my life, but... it's gonna be hard I think. Atleast right know, because I am 16. I've got savings, so I should be able to live a little while away from home, I want to work really bad, but my education isnt up there. I don't want to nessacarilly get my education up there either if I am not interested in the subjects being taught.

So it looks like a rocky road ahead of me. I can barely stand my parents. Really, really want a girlfriend, wife, sex. Got no purpose, controlling parents, and I am basically wasting my life.

So damn. I'll wait till I am 18, then I geuss I'll leave home and become a janitor. Hopefully some girl will want to marry me.

Thanks for reading- peaceout. -Phillip.